I exchanged text messages with my sister last night. She updated me on my nephew's condition. The docs think it's viral infection. My sister takes him for a follow up tomorrow. Like I had been saying all along, it would be nothing serious. Hey I'm the Pope. I know these things.
I tell Violet the same thing. Well, not the Pope part. She thinks I'm weird enough as it is. Like a few weeks ago we were at the mall and she pointed out some Indian people. We laugh cause when she first saw me she thought I was Indian (of the Hindu variety). I went into character and used my Hindi accent. She just looked at me and called me weird. I love it!
I've been off work since Saturday. I don't go back until Wednesday. Wonderful thing called shift work. I really don't mind it. I get tons of time off. If I were to work no overtime, I literally have half the year off. But I always end up working a shit load of overtime cause I like making even shitloads more money than I make now.
Anyway, I touch on the work subject because there is the remote chance I might get transferred by this summer. Do I want to go? No and yes. No cause I'm happy where I'm at and I pretty much get to do anything I want. I definitely get away with a lot of stuff on the nights and weekend shifts. I get to read, do personal things like pay bills and even take movies and video games to work. On the other hand I do want to get forced to transfer. In being forced to another department, I keep my departmental seniority. If I volunteer I keep my plant seniority but lose my departmental. Plant seniority is the important one. That's how they determine layoffs. Departmental seniority determines things like who gets moved around and who gets preferred shifts.
So back to my potential move. By keeping my departmental seniority at the new place, I'll be like four or five retirements or deaths from a straight day job. I'd still be working the four on four off schedule but no longer nights. I'd prefer to go to a straight night job but those don't exist. The only reason I'll go straight day is so I can straighten out my sleep patterns. For the first eight years I could switch back and forth like nothing. Now it's a bitch. I'm a night owl so I adjust easily to nights. At least now that I've been diagnosed with sleep apnea and use a CPAP I'm no longer falling over at my desk sleeping.
And now for a the introduction of a new character to my little melodrama here. I'll call him Pointdexter. That's as close to his real nickname I can get without revealing who he. You know me, I'm striving for total anonymity here.
I've been good friends with Pointdexter since sixth grade. He earned the nickname way back then and it stuck. To this day we still call him that. Check my cell phone and it has Pointdexter on my contact list.
Anyway, I hadn't mentioned him before cause, well, there isn't much to mention about him. His divorce could make for good drama but that's a year stale. No, I mention him now cause the mother fucker loves to text message. I text message most of my friends. It's fun and it's a good way to pass the time while at work. This dude though writes Phd dissertations with his texts. If I hear my phone beep more than once I know it's him and his novel texting. I gets to the point where I either ignore him or tell him I'm with Violet or William. Or that I'm busy at work. Our frined Binks says me and Pointdexter have a regular bromance going. I told Binks that whatever he does don't give Pointdexter his cell number. He said don't worry. I won't since I'm Bink's best friend and I don't have his cell.
Pontdexter makes an interesting entrance here I think. While he's quiet now, he'll drum up some drama later. And that all is good for this little melodrama of mine.
Looks like Dee in Tampa is getting ready to wind up with some new drama. I'm online with her right now and we are chatting about her current boyfriend situation.
Finally a word on the Pope. I get my license restored in exactly three weeks. Three fucking weeks. I'm going insane with anticipation. I'm like a kid waiting for Christmas. You know it's coming, you know exactly when it will be there, the presents are under the tree but you just can't fucking touch them. I know soon enough it will be over.
All right, there's a sandwich or some other food with my name on it some where in the Papal kitchen.
Signing off,
Pope John Paul III
Monday, January 26, 2009
Friday, January 23, 2009
More Unluckyness for Violet, Nephew Update
Well it doesn't ever get any better for Violet. She had a doctor's appointment yesterday. The doc told her that she found something in the mammogram. She's sending Violet to have another one done just to make sure and also have a sonogram done. Violet is very scared. I don't blame her. I'm scared for her. I told her she needed to stay strong and keep her faith. I'm praying for her hard that it's nothing major. If it turns out to be worse I told her to be strong and hang in there. I'll be driving again soon and I'll what I can for her. I'm trying not to think of that though.
It appears my six year old nephew will be fine. The tests came back that it's more than likely some kind of infection. The indicator for cancer were low. His doctor consulted with three pathologists and they came to the same conclusion. They will run some follow up tests next week and he will again consult the three pathologists just as a precaution.
I'm so relieved.
Good night, my day is just starting,
The Pope
It appears my six year old nephew will be fine. The tests came back that it's more than likely some kind of infection. The indicator for cancer were low. His doctor consulted with three pathologists and they came to the same conclusion. They will run some follow up tests next week and he will again consult the three pathologists just as a precaution.
I'm so relieved.
Good night, my day is just starting,
The Pope
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Terry Therapy Session XIII, Other Stuff
Terry Therapy Sessions XIII
It's been over two weeks since the actual session. I usually write something the day of or after the session. So I really can't remember much of what we talked about.
I know we talked about the upcoming changes in my life. The impending move, the reinstatement of my drivers license and finding new and interesting ways to stay sober.
At the end of the session she proclaimed me officially done. She told me I pretty much had my shit together and sounded like I had a solid plan in place.
She said that we could continue sessions if I wanted to. I said yes immediately. Terry helps me talk through and process ideas and my life in general. It's something all my wonderful rehab classes stress. Find a way to cope and process before I relapse. Since I hate those fucking rehab groups and AA meetings, Terry is my coping tool.
Plus right now I'm cooped up in my apartment. I can't go anywhere easily. Once I'm out and about again I'm sure I will need my therapist again. I'm sure issues will pop up. I know issues will arise. Maybe not drinking but life is out there waiting for me and I need help to learn how to cope. I can't easily walk away from my therapy since I trust her so much and she's helped me this far. So I look forward to more Terry Therapy.
New Year Celebrations
I did exactly nothing for New Years. I thought about hitting a strip club or looking for something local. I thought what the hell. I won't go out and drink. I just had a need to be around people. Then I go lazy, turned on the TV, watched Dick Clark slur his speech and went to sleep.
I thought about calling Rebecca and us going out. She's kind of a New Year's habit. Even last year we both thought about asking the other out but neither of us acted on it. This year I thought she would be with her worthless ex-boyfriend; the disbarred lawyer, the idiot she dated before me. To my surprised she didn't. I thought she spent both Christmas and New Years with him. He's just her fall back. She ended up spending both holidays with her ex-husband, his wife and her daughter. I thought that if she didn't spend it with dipshit she'd have some date. I'm surprised she didn't.
Unlucky in Life
The other ex, Violet, is just one chain reaction of bad luck. I have no idea on where I left off on her story since my last blog. I guess I could go look it up but I won't. In brief, her kidney infection has gotten worse. The good news is her insurance from her job has kicked in. So she's no longer getting gouged on medication. It's unbelievable what they charge the uninsured for medication. Anyway, the infection didn't respond to some of the meds they gave her so she was hospitalized. She's now on stronger meds and has to go weekly to the doctor for six months. She told her that if she didn't keep up with the follow up visits and meds that she will end up in the hospital again and things will only get worse.
I hope it sinks it. Violet called me the other day and said she didn't feel much better. I stressed to her that it has only been a week since she's been on the intense program. It needs time. I told her not to get discouraged. I also told her to bring up her depression with her doctor. It's very important that she gets medication for it. I told her not to get discouraged with depression medication to. That what ever she's prescribed it will more than likely take about three weeks to kick in fully. I haven't talked to her in a couple of days so I should hear from her today.
Sophia
Nothing much to report on that front. I called her on New Years Day and wished her well. We talked briefly. I told her that I will be getting my license back soon and I hoped to see her soon. She said she's looking forward to seeing me to.
I'm still clinging to some hope that we may end up together. We were headed that way until I fucked up and ended up with drunk driving conviction. I know the bullshit, if it was meant to be it will happen. Whatever....stick that bullshit where the sun doesn't shine.
Family Front
I haven't written much about my family lately. Mainly because I'm turning back into my usual grouch of a person. I didn't talk to them on New Years and only had a brief ten second call to my mom on Christmas.
So the only news I have is from my two favorite nephews. The first is good news. My brother's second kid called me to tell me he's getting married. It's not a surprise since they've been dating for about two or three years. I told him as long as there's not a home football game I'll be at the wedding. People think I'm joking. I'm not. I asked my mom if his girlfriend is a Bigfoot. My mom asked why? I said cause like the Yeti, I always hear about her but I've never seen her. I won't believe it until I see her. As far as I'm concerned, his fiance, the Yeti, the Easter Bunny and Santa are all the same person.
The other is scary news. My sister's six year old has two lumps in his neck and one under his armpit. It has us all scared. He's been to the doctor. At first the doctor said just to observe it for two weeks. Now my nephew is starting to undergo testing to try and figure out what's going on. Mumps and mono have been ruled out. It may be a viral infection. It may be worse but I tell my mom and my sister not to think about that. We'll deal with it if it gets worse. But right now they follow doctor's orders and pray for the best. I seriously doubt it's anything to serious. I, of course, can't convey that feeling to my mom and sister. They are both near hysterics and I'm sure my brother-in-law is to. I really think the kid will be okay.
Snakes on a Dream
I've had two really vivid dreams over the last few night/days.
The snake one was the first two nights ago. There is more to it but I can't remember it. What I do remember is very vivid and in bright realistic color. I'm standing over an large aquarium and I see a snake hidden under decorative fallen log. A fish is swimming closer to the log. As the fish gets closer, the snake moves his head into position to strike if the fish gets close enough. The fish gets in range and the snake nabs it at a blur. Then the snake starts to coil around the fish like a boa constrictor and eventually starts to eat the fish.
Then a really bizarre thing happens. I watch almost the same sequence of events. This time though I'm watching from the other side of the aquarium and below the water line.
The second dream was yesterday after I had worked the night shift. In the dream I don't know where I'm at. I'm not sure if I'm in a building, parking garage or a cave. Off in the distance is the entrance to where I'm at. Suddenly the bottom starts to fall out and the entrance seems further away. I start running up an incline to get to the opening. It seems to be a cave in or an earthquake but something causes where I'm at to shift. When I get to the entrance I find it so small I can't fit through it. There are at least two other people trapped in there with me. I look outside where I see and hear people moving around. I don't know if they are trying to rescue us or have no clue. I yell out and one person waves to acknowledge they heard me. I still have no clue about a rescue though.
Me and the others start to walk away from the opening. I'm not sure if we are looking for another way out. The ground begins to move and shake again. I start running back to the entrance hoping that it opens enough for me to run out. No luck. I still can't fit through. Anxiety and desperation start to set it. I feel completely helpless.
Then I wake up. It was a relief to wake up in my bed. When I finally get my wits about me I realize how realistic the dream was. I had been genuinely scared and desperate when I woke up. I felt like a big burden had been lifted or I had been spared something horrible by waking up.
I don't believe in dream interpretation but I think there is something squirrelly going on. I dream goofy realistic dreams before. This time though I think something is different. I've googled dreams and the dreams I've had. Snakes in dreams mean so many things I can't even think what they mean in mine. I can't find anything on cave in dreams yet.
Oh well, I'm getting sleepy. I do like working nights instead of days. I sleep better. I'm going to go watch the new episode of Lost. One of the few TV shows I enjoy.
Good night.
It's been over two weeks since the actual session. I usually write something the day of or after the session. So I really can't remember much of what we talked about.
I know we talked about the upcoming changes in my life. The impending move, the reinstatement of my drivers license and finding new and interesting ways to stay sober.
At the end of the session she proclaimed me officially done. She told me I pretty much had my shit together and sounded like I had a solid plan in place.
She said that we could continue sessions if I wanted to. I said yes immediately. Terry helps me talk through and process ideas and my life in general. It's something all my wonderful rehab classes stress. Find a way to cope and process before I relapse. Since I hate those fucking rehab groups and AA meetings, Terry is my coping tool.
Plus right now I'm cooped up in my apartment. I can't go anywhere easily. Once I'm out and about again I'm sure I will need my therapist again. I'm sure issues will pop up. I know issues will arise. Maybe not drinking but life is out there waiting for me and I need help to learn how to cope. I can't easily walk away from my therapy since I trust her so much and she's helped me this far. So I look forward to more Terry Therapy.
New Year Celebrations
I did exactly nothing for New Years. I thought about hitting a strip club or looking for something local. I thought what the hell. I won't go out and drink. I just had a need to be around people. Then I go lazy, turned on the TV, watched Dick Clark slur his speech and went to sleep.
I thought about calling Rebecca and us going out. She's kind of a New Year's habit. Even last year we both thought about asking the other out but neither of us acted on it. This year I thought she would be with her worthless ex-boyfriend; the disbarred lawyer, the idiot she dated before me. To my surprised she didn't. I thought she spent both Christmas and New Years with him. He's just her fall back. She ended up spending both holidays with her ex-husband, his wife and her daughter. I thought that if she didn't spend it with dipshit she'd have some date. I'm surprised she didn't.
Unlucky in Life
The other ex, Violet, is just one chain reaction of bad luck. I have no idea on where I left off on her story since my last blog. I guess I could go look it up but I won't. In brief, her kidney infection has gotten worse. The good news is her insurance from her job has kicked in. So she's no longer getting gouged on medication. It's unbelievable what they charge the uninsured for medication. Anyway, the infection didn't respond to some of the meds they gave her so she was hospitalized. She's now on stronger meds and has to go weekly to the doctor for six months. She told her that if she didn't keep up with the follow up visits and meds that she will end up in the hospital again and things will only get worse.
I hope it sinks it. Violet called me the other day and said she didn't feel much better. I stressed to her that it has only been a week since she's been on the intense program. It needs time. I told her not to get discouraged. I also told her to bring up her depression with her doctor. It's very important that she gets medication for it. I told her not to get discouraged with depression medication to. That what ever she's prescribed it will more than likely take about three weeks to kick in fully. I haven't talked to her in a couple of days so I should hear from her today.
Sophia
Nothing much to report on that front. I called her on New Years Day and wished her well. We talked briefly. I told her that I will be getting my license back soon and I hoped to see her soon. She said she's looking forward to seeing me to.
I'm still clinging to some hope that we may end up together. We were headed that way until I fucked up and ended up with drunk driving conviction. I know the bullshit, if it was meant to be it will happen. Whatever....stick that bullshit where the sun doesn't shine.
Family Front
I haven't written much about my family lately. Mainly because I'm turning back into my usual grouch of a person. I didn't talk to them on New Years and only had a brief ten second call to my mom on Christmas.
So the only news I have is from my two favorite nephews. The first is good news. My brother's second kid called me to tell me he's getting married. It's not a surprise since they've been dating for about two or three years. I told him as long as there's not a home football game I'll be at the wedding. People think I'm joking. I'm not. I asked my mom if his girlfriend is a Bigfoot. My mom asked why? I said cause like the Yeti, I always hear about her but I've never seen her. I won't believe it until I see her. As far as I'm concerned, his fiance, the Yeti, the Easter Bunny and Santa are all the same person.
The other is scary news. My sister's six year old has two lumps in his neck and one under his armpit. It has us all scared. He's been to the doctor. At first the doctor said just to observe it for two weeks. Now my nephew is starting to undergo testing to try and figure out what's going on. Mumps and mono have been ruled out. It may be a viral infection. It may be worse but I tell my mom and my sister not to think about that. We'll deal with it if it gets worse. But right now they follow doctor's orders and pray for the best. I seriously doubt it's anything to serious. I, of course, can't convey that feeling to my mom and sister. They are both near hysterics and I'm sure my brother-in-law is to. I really think the kid will be okay.
Snakes on a Dream
I've had two really vivid dreams over the last few night/days.
The snake one was the first two nights ago. There is more to it but I can't remember it. What I do remember is very vivid and in bright realistic color. I'm standing over an large aquarium and I see a snake hidden under decorative fallen log. A fish is swimming closer to the log. As the fish gets closer, the snake moves his head into position to strike if the fish gets close enough. The fish gets in range and the snake nabs it at a blur. Then the snake starts to coil around the fish like a boa constrictor and eventually starts to eat the fish.
Then a really bizarre thing happens. I watch almost the same sequence of events. This time though I'm watching from the other side of the aquarium and below the water line.
The second dream was yesterday after I had worked the night shift. In the dream I don't know where I'm at. I'm not sure if I'm in a building, parking garage or a cave. Off in the distance is the entrance to where I'm at. Suddenly the bottom starts to fall out and the entrance seems further away. I start running up an incline to get to the opening. It seems to be a cave in or an earthquake but something causes where I'm at to shift. When I get to the entrance I find it so small I can't fit through it. There are at least two other people trapped in there with me. I look outside where I see and hear people moving around. I don't know if they are trying to rescue us or have no clue. I yell out and one person waves to acknowledge they heard me. I still have no clue about a rescue though.
Me and the others start to walk away from the opening. I'm not sure if we are looking for another way out. The ground begins to move and shake again. I start running back to the entrance hoping that it opens enough for me to run out. No luck. I still can't fit through. Anxiety and desperation start to set it. I feel completely helpless.
Then I wake up. It was a relief to wake up in my bed. When I finally get my wits about me I realize how realistic the dream was. I had been genuinely scared and desperate when I woke up. I felt like a big burden had been lifted or I had been spared something horrible by waking up.
I don't believe in dream interpretation but I think there is something squirrelly going on. I dream goofy realistic dreams before. This time though I think something is different. I've googled dreams and the dreams I've had. Snakes in dreams mean so many things I can't even think what they mean in mine. I can't find anything on cave in dreams yet.
Oh well, I'm getting sleepy. I do like working nights instead of days. I sleep better. I'm going to go watch the new episode of Lost. One of the few TV shows I enjoy.
Good night.
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