I think I'm on my 15th session with Terry. I'm to lazy to look it up so I'm going with 15 here on forward.
It wasn't a bad session. As usual we talked about me maintaining my sobriety and the things I'm doing to stay that way. For example, my camping trip was one way I'm keeping myself busy and out of trouble.
She asked me if I still had thoughts about drinking. I said of course. Not only during my camping trip but at the NFL draft party I went to. Sitting at home on my off days, I think about drinking to. But they are just thoughts. I don't linger on it. I have my thoughts about it, push them out of my brain and go on my way. Sure, even though I'm randomly tested at work, I know I can get away with it. But what if I slip up at the wrong time? To me it isn't worth the price of losing my job. Terry said it's good I have the thoughts but can deal with it. She said the thoughts are different from urges. Urges are stronger. Since my thoughts are fleeting she doesn't see any real danger. She also told me that as more time passes the thoughts won't be as often and some day they will disappear completely.
Terry asked how's the love life? I laughed and said what love life. I did tell her my concerns with both Rebecca and Violet. I told her about the whining both did at Valentine's that I didn't call or send flowers. I told her about the night of the harpies with Rebecca's friends. I told her that Violet is the one that concerns me more. She's getting possessive of me and expects things from me that a boyfriend or sometimes husband does. Not a friend.
Terry said I need to be careful because women can take some actions from a man that he's interested in them. In my case it's more dangerous since both women are my ex-girlfriends. She says what I may view as just hanging out, movies and dinner may start to form in their minds that we are back together again. Even though there is no romance they can start think, "Well I have a boyfriend." Oy vay, I don't really want to deal with that. Terry then laughed and said,"Isn't it great to be love?" I told her no. Instead I thought it was pretty scary.
Terry just urged me to proceed with caution with both. My biggest fear is Violet. Rebecca can rebound pretty quick. She can be cold or at least put up a strong front when she want. I told Terry my fear is Violet will be devastated when I start dating again. She agreed with me that if Violet causes me grief over a new girlfriend that I have to cut Violet completely out of my life. I'd hate to be I can't sacrifice my happiness over her.
Those were the big topics we talked about. We talked some about my new assignment with BOC (BIG OIL Company - my employer) and how I was adjusting to that. Family matters and how my mother is finally leaving me alone. We even talked briefly about my future with BOC and when I think I'd like to leave and retire. My thing is this. As long as I'm healthy I still want to work. If reach retirement age (55 at BOC) and I still need to work, I see no reason to leave BOC. If I can leave and don't need the income, I'd like to travel and pursue maybe a second career. 55 is to young to sit around and sniff the seats where old women have sat.
Sophia
I don't know what to say about Sophia. There really isn't much to say. She's either really busy, has a boyfriend or is playing hard to get.
The New Job
I'm in week two of training. I can tell my trainer gets really annoyed with me. I feel like telling him,"Look mother fucker, you've been doing this shit for 18 years. I've been doing it for exactly five days. Back the fuck off." But I don't. I just nod my head and go with the flow. Underneath though I'm boiling. I was going to finish up with him this week but I decided after this morning's fiasco that I'm not ready to sign off yet. He'll have to deal with me one more week. He told me not to listen to management. He doesn't like to train more than two weeks but for me to take my time and learn the job right. He won't pressure me to finish up.
Big sign that I'm slightly peeved about training? My blood pressure is fucking high. 154/90 when I took it the other day while on break. We have a machine at work. My normal blood pressure at the docs and other times I've taken it is around 128/78. I can see I'm slightly aggravated.
I'm wrapping up my long session now. There is more I want to write but I need to sleep and be bright eyed and angry at work tomorrow. The beauty of my job is my work week is over on Tuesday.
Oh wait one more quick thing.
The Scallops are Boy Toys?
I wrote about my gay neighbors the Scallops last time. We have assigned parking in my building. The car next to me at first was driven by a Arnold Schwarzenegger Terminator wanna be. He's the kind of douche bag that wears a leather jacket, black shirt, sunglasses and shaves his head. Other than looking like a douche, he looks normal. In case you haven't guessed it, I think everybody in my apartment building is a douche bag. I live in Douche Bag Central. After some time passes, I met the Scallops and then noticed they also parked next to me. I didn't think much more of it. I thought maybe they had lent someone the car. Hadn't seen Arnold Douche-a-nator lately. That is until yesterday. As I was drilling a hole in my car floorboard (that's another story), Arnie the Douche walks by and gets in the Scallop-mobile. Then it dawned on me. I only see Arnie occasionally but I see the Scallops running amok and doing whatever it is gay men who don't work full time do. I think the Scallops, both of them, are Arnie's Boy Toys. I think Arold the Douchebag keeps these gay Asian guys on the side. Even if he doesn't, it's fun to speculate. Whatever, all three are douchebags. Actually I take it back. The little fag and Awnald are douches. The other gay dude at least says hi and isn't snooty like the other two.
Okay, good night,
Your Scallop Observing Pope-a-nator
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
I'm Back, New Job
I had a fucking blast on my little time in the woods. I fished, looked for alligators, hiked, visited historic sites, stalked a bird and ate ungodly amounts of food.
Then I started my new job. At first I was a little apprehensive. Yeah, I worked there before. I know people there. I know the product. I know the systems. I know the computers. Yet, I didn't know the new testing. I worked in the same building ten years ago but I worked in a different section. I have to learn a whole new set of lab tests. Had I been returned to my old section I could have skated. Ten years is a long time but I still remember how to run a lot of those tests. It wouldn't take me near as long to train.
The good news is I get to work straight days for at least four to six months while I train. The eve better news is that if someone in front of me on seniority list dies or retires, I move u one slot and get a permanent straight day job. That's the reasoning management gave me for placing me in the new section. It's where they expect the next retirement to occur so they saw no point to train me for a few months only for me to have to move and train again. Not like I really have a choice. I got my marching orders and I have to go. In this economy I'm grateful for my job.
My training hasn't gone to bad. My trainer isn't the friendliest guy. He doesn't like to be bothered. He had me follow him around the first two days but told me to go away every once in a while. So I went and met the new people and reintroduced myself to my old coworkers. The second two days I did a lot of hands on. I could tell he was getting frustrated with me sometimes. I made a few mistakes but hey this is all new to me. He's taking a sensei-grasshopper approach to the training. He keeps emphasizing that he's passing on all his 18 years experience to me. I just nod and smile while thinking I need to hurry up and finish training.
The Scallops
I have a new name for my gay raving douchebag neighbors: "The Scallops." In college I worked at a video store where a prerequisite for management was to be a homosexual. Straight people were allowed to work there but only one manager was straight. The "girls" always referred to a woman or other gay man they didn't like as a scallop. So I figure it's a nice insulting thing to call my neighbor the gay douchebag. Hello, you little scallop.
The Car
I took my car in to get checked out. The good news is the engine is in great shape. I need to do some preventative maintenance like changing out the hoses, timing belt and heater hoses. The mechanic said it should last several years if I take care of it. Else I'll end up stranded on the side of the road some where. He figures around $800 for the work.
The bad news is that it looks like shit. Lily's brother painted it for me two years ago when it oxidized real bad. It was a stop gap measure. Hey I paid the guy $400 under the table. So I took it to a friend of a friend of mine. He gave me an estimate of $1900. He showed me the before and after pictures of his work. He does incredible work. Some the cars looked like total crap. It may seem like a steep price but the dealership is closer to $3000.
My reasoning is that fixing up the car for around $4000 is better than getting into a car note for the next five years. I gotta spend that overtime money on something that makes me feel happy. The teeth are a necessity. The car is my luxury.
The Women
I hear from them all but still haven't hadI a chance to see Sophia. I know it's a process to win her heart back.
Rebecca called me on Mother's Day to wish me a happy father's day. She cracked me up.
Of course came the moan and groan from Violet. Why didn't you call me she asked me today. Mother fuck woman. Your my friend. Not my mother, not my wife and not the mother of my children. Why the fuck should I call on mother's day?
As usual she asks me if I've heard from Rebecca. I told her about the father's day joke. Violet didn't laugh. A friend of mine said Violet is scared of losing me. I told my friend she lost me years ago. Violet last week twice told me to stay away from any of the new girls from work. At first I thought maybe she was joking. The second time she said it I don't think she was. She's starting to remind me of Rose on "Two and a Half Men." I'm expecting to finder climbing through my patio window any day now.
I made myself promise I won't spend so much time with her anymore. Yet I still find myself hanging out with her. I went and had lunch with her today. Tonight I'm going over to her place to watch a movie. I must fucking be bored. Maybe I'm better off hammering a nail through my dick.
Tomorrow is Terry Therapy Session day. She laughed because I called her in the middle of my camping trip to set up my therapy session for the month. She said,"Wow. Camping and you need therapy." We had a good laugh about it.
That's it for now. I'm going to go meet Violet. God I'm so stupid. Sophia, I need you to take me away from this broad.
THE FO SHIZZLE POPE-IZZLE
Then I started my new job. At first I was a little apprehensive. Yeah, I worked there before. I know people there. I know the product. I know the systems. I know the computers. Yet, I didn't know the new testing. I worked in the same building ten years ago but I worked in a different section. I have to learn a whole new set of lab tests. Had I been returned to my old section I could have skated. Ten years is a long time but I still remember how to run a lot of those tests. It wouldn't take me near as long to train.
The good news is I get to work straight days for at least four to six months while I train. The eve better news is that if someone in front of me on seniority list dies or retires, I move u one slot and get a permanent straight day job. That's the reasoning management gave me for placing me in the new section. It's where they expect the next retirement to occur so they saw no point to train me for a few months only for me to have to move and train again. Not like I really have a choice. I got my marching orders and I have to go. In this economy I'm grateful for my job.
My training hasn't gone to bad. My trainer isn't the friendliest guy. He doesn't like to be bothered. He had me follow him around the first two days but told me to go away every once in a while. So I went and met the new people and reintroduced myself to my old coworkers. The second two days I did a lot of hands on. I could tell he was getting frustrated with me sometimes. I made a few mistakes but hey this is all new to me. He's taking a sensei-grasshopper approach to the training. He keeps emphasizing that he's passing on all his 18 years experience to me. I just nod and smile while thinking I need to hurry up and finish training.
The Scallops
I have a new name for my gay raving douchebag neighbors: "The Scallops." In college I worked at a video store where a prerequisite for management was to be a homosexual. Straight people were allowed to work there but only one manager was straight. The "girls" always referred to a woman or other gay man they didn't like as a scallop. So I figure it's a nice insulting thing to call my neighbor the gay douchebag. Hello, you little scallop.
The Car
I took my car in to get checked out. The good news is the engine is in great shape. I need to do some preventative maintenance like changing out the hoses, timing belt and heater hoses. The mechanic said it should last several years if I take care of it. Else I'll end up stranded on the side of the road some where. He figures around $800 for the work.
The bad news is that it looks like shit. Lily's brother painted it for me two years ago when it oxidized real bad. It was a stop gap measure. Hey I paid the guy $400 under the table. So I took it to a friend of a friend of mine. He gave me an estimate of $1900. He showed me the before and after pictures of his work. He does incredible work. Some the cars looked like total crap. It may seem like a steep price but the dealership is closer to $3000.
My reasoning is that fixing up the car for around $4000 is better than getting into a car note for the next five years. I gotta spend that overtime money on something that makes me feel happy. The teeth are a necessity. The car is my luxury.
The Women
I hear from them all but still haven't hadI a chance to see Sophia. I know it's a process to win her heart back.
Rebecca called me on Mother's Day to wish me a happy father's day. She cracked me up.
Of course came the moan and groan from Violet. Why didn't you call me she asked me today. Mother fuck woman. Your my friend. Not my mother, not my wife and not the mother of my children. Why the fuck should I call on mother's day?
As usual she asks me if I've heard from Rebecca. I told her about the father's day joke. Violet didn't laugh. A friend of mine said Violet is scared of losing me. I told my friend she lost me years ago. Violet last week twice told me to stay away from any of the new girls from work. At first I thought maybe she was joking. The second time she said it I don't think she was. She's starting to remind me of Rose on "Two and a Half Men." I'm expecting to finder climbing through my patio window any day now.
I made myself promise I won't spend so much time with her anymore. Yet I still find myself hanging out with her. I went and had lunch with her today. Tonight I'm going over to her place to watch a movie. I must fucking be bored. Maybe I'm better off hammering a nail through my dick.
Tomorrow is Terry Therapy Session day. She laughed because I called her in the middle of my camping trip to set up my therapy session for the month. She said,"Wow. Camping and you need therapy." We had a good laugh about it.
That's it for now. I'm going to go meet Violet. God I'm so stupid. Sophia, I need you to take me away from this broad.
THE FO SHIZZLE POPE-IZZLE
Saturday, May 2, 2009
More Downtime, Gay Guy Douche Bag Neighbor
My transfer is official May 3 but I don't have to show up until May 8th. Since I'm changing shifts entirely I was going to have three of my four days off, work one day and then have four off. I decided to take the one day between shifts off. I get a week vacation by only taking one day off. Awesome.
I debated what to do with my off time. A three night stay at a lakeside state park is in order. I bought new camping equipment his weekend. Got fresh live worms and bait shrimp to. It's gonna be nice and relaxing. There is an old historic Confederate Veteran Reunion site nearby and a historic fort. Add that to fishing, camping, hiking and ungodly amounts of food and I have a great week planned. I'm turning off my cell phone and only letting a few know where I'll be at.
Douche Bags R Us
I've stated before and I'll say it again, I live in Douche Bag Central. We have a catered breakfast every Saturday. I went down there for the first time. Talk about an unfriendly bunch of assholes. Even the serving woman, who I just found out is my neighbor's maid, doesn't say shit to me.
Then there is the rave on the other side of me. Today I finally got to meet the raving neighbors. They were coming back from the pool while I was taking out the trash. To put it mildly, saying they were light in the loafers is an understatement. They were a couple of flamers. Not like I really care.
So being the friendly guy I am, until pissed off, I said hi to them. One was nice enough and said hello. The other looked at me like I was a piece of shit. Like how I dare say anything to his "partner." To hell with the little cock sucking douche bag.
Oh well, I'll be back in a week with how my first day on my new job went. Tell you how many people there that I hate off the bat. Hey, that's just how I roll.
I debated what to do with my off time. A three night stay at a lakeside state park is in order. I bought new camping equipment his weekend. Got fresh live worms and bait shrimp to. It's gonna be nice and relaxing. There is an old historic Confederate Veteran Reunion site nearby and a historic fort. Add that to fishing, camping, hiking and ungodly amounts of food and I have a great week planned. I'm turning off my cell phone and only letting a few know where I'll be at.
Douche Bags R Us
I've stated before and I'll say it again, I live in Douche Bag Central. We have a catered breakfast every Saturday. I went down there for the first time. Talk about an unfriendly bunch of assholes. Even the serving woman, who I just found out is my neighbor's maid, doesn't say shit to me.
Then there is the rave on the other side of me. Today I finally got to meet the raving neighbors. They were coming back from the pool while I was taking out the trash. To put it mildly, saying they were light in the loafers is an understatement. They were a couple of flamers. Not like I really care.
So being the friendly guy I am, until pissed off, I said hi to them. One was nice enough and said hello. The other looked at me like I was a piece of shit. Like how I dare say anything to his "partner." To hell with the little cock sucking douche bag.
Oh well, I'll be back in a week with how my first day on my new job went. Tell you how many people there that I hate off the bat. Hey, that's just how I roll.
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