Little Town House on the Prairie

Seriously? No updates since March? I've really let the blog fall into disrepair. As to be expected lotsa stuff has happened. Nothing bad. One big piece of news to report. The rest probably were good anecdotes and funny stories. Unfortunately those fade with time and I can't do them justice retelling them now. I'm really going to try and update more frequently. I've said in the past so let's see what happens.

Return of the Rebecca
For starters, Rebecca returned from exile a few weeks ago. I couldn't get it out of her why she went missing for six months. I didn't try really hard either to get it out of her.

For the record, Rebecca is my former Eastern European girlfriend whom I've stayed friends with after our break up four years ago. We were friends for many years before we were a couple. As I like to say, "She's a great friend but a lousy girlfriend." Some things were just meant not to be.

One morning about two weeks ago I sent her a text message just asking if she was still alive. Since she's been nonexistent in my life for months, I assumed I wouldn't hear from her. Ever. So I was shocked when she called me that evening on my commute home from work. When I asked her what had been going on she danced around the question. I let it go.

My guess all along in her silence is that she was in a relationship with someone. Fine. I figured if she was happy then let it go, let her live her life.

At the end of the conversation she asked when I had a weekend free. I told her I'd let her know.

Fast forward to two days ago. I called her after work to see if she was free this or next weekend. Her modus operandi is to let the phone ring and return the call later. It wasn't until we were together that she actually picked up when I called. I expected the voicemail and the return call the next day. Surprisingly two rings in she answered.

"Oh Pope, I was thinking about you today. I was going to call you. I need to talk to you. Blah blah blah." Her business is doing bad. She wanted to bounce some ideas off me. Being the Pope carries some responsibilities. When The Flock reaches out to me, I must listen. At the end of her laments, I told her she must do what is best for her and whatever she needs to do to get by.

The Big News
After we got Rebecca time over, she asked me how I was doing.

Let's pause the story for a little background info. Being the Pope, I must maintain modest yet appropriate residences. A Pope works hard. Thus a Pope also requires much relaxation when he can afford it. Thus I live in a small but luxurious apartment. The Flock spake many times unto me,"Oh Holy Father, thou art deserving of a more permanent residence."

I replied,"Verily, I say unto thee, it is not the time for the Pope to assume the debt of a permanent residence. For the Flock's tithes support the Pope and he doeth not deem these hard economic times appropriate for more luxury when so many suffer."

Now back to the main plot. Rebecca asked how I was doing. I replied,"Hon, next week I close on a town house in the heart of the city."

The Permanent Residence
I finally decided now was the time to take the plunge into real estate. I put off for many years buying a house. I've wanted one but never deemed it the right time.

About a year into my relationship with Rebecca, I decided that it was time to buy a house. If things worked out long term then she and her daughter could move in with me. If things didn't work out then I had a place to live. Unfortunately I picked the height of the housing boom to look. Fortunately, not only am I the Pope, but I'm Jewish also. I decided that the housing boom outweighed any benefits of home ownership at the time.

The house search actually went very quick once I found the right real estate agent. My first agent ignored me. Once I protested about her lack of response she passed me onto her assistant. He turned out to be a disaster. He was a religious mental midget who only dealt with real estate part time. But that's a tale for another day.

To suffice for now, I asked a friend who he used. He recommended someone who I will admit kicked some major ass. This guy is a real go getter.

To wind this post down, in a week the Pope will be owner of his own home. I'm very happy about it. Three things convinced me of this purchase...location location location. It's wonderful. I'll post more on that soon.

Good night...even a Pope needs his beauty sleep.