Not sure why I feel myself slipping into a depression. Or maybe it isn't depression but the "L" word...no not lesbian or love but "loneliness"? The Loner is Lonely?
Quiet honestly it is depression. I suffered enough of it over the course of my lifetime to know the symptoms. I don't want to get out of bed. I just want to sleep the day away. I don't want to eat. I don't want to do anything.
The first thing I did set a time to get out of bed. Okay, so it was 11:00 a.m. but I set a time and stuck to it.
I'm hungry but I don't want to eat. My buddy Will is off from work. I might call him and see if he wants to go grab lunch.
I need to clean up my apartment. It isn't messy but it's cluttered. So that's on the agenda.
I'm slowly upgrading my wardrobe. All my shit is either old or I'm tired of. I want some new nice stuff. Dress to impress. Or at least not look like a bum.
If going to the Monday Night Football game tonight doesn't snap me out of my depression nothing will. Football is my drug. It comes only for a short time each year (8 home games) so I suck it up like crack going out of production.
I've got plenty to do. So I just gotta grab myself by my scruffy neck, shake myself and get moving. I know the worst thing for depression is to let it fester.
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I just called Will to see ask him something. He sounded worst than me. He just called me back. He just told me his father is terminal. He didn't tell me with what. I don't think it's the Alzheimer but maybe something related.
I was going to spend Thanksgiving with them but they are going out of town to see their father. It might be the last one they spend with him. I'm sorry to hear that.
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